Why the changes to the site . . . .
 

I recently received e-mail asking why the site had changed in the last few days. It is a valid question, and I am sure there are others that have noticed, as well. To provide an answer, I must digress.

In 1996 I left an unfulfilling life in Key Largo and headed west.  I had no idea where I would end up, but anyplace was better than the life I had chosen in South Florida.  I eventually wound up in Colorado Springs and dedicated myself fulltime to making a living as a film and video producer – and washing cars for cash while I got established. I planned to start “The Trip” in October of ’97.  In the summer of that year, my life took an unexpected turn (an old flame came back into my life) and I felt compelled to delay my departure to the following year.

In the beginning, The Trip was meant to be a personal journey of discovery.  I was going to keep a journal (as I will write a book about this someday), and I didn't want to be committed to a relationship for the time I was gone.  Being a journey of the heart, I didn't want to be burdened with the emotional stress that can sometimes come with a relationship.  I also didn't feel it was right, or honorable, to ask someone to wait while I went out and "found myself." 

I was also thinking of bringing a small video camera along to document the places I went, and some of the people I met.  At worst, the video would make for some interesting home movies.  At best, it would make an interesting television program.  Creating a small website where I could post my journals was in the back of my mind, but I wasn’t too web savvy then (not that I claim to be now).

As the years passed and my departure date kept getting pushed off (due to the relationship getting more serious), the producer in me began to see all the “commercially viable possibilities” such a venture would create for my career, thus effectively obscuring my original plans that had been led, up to that point, by my heart.

In late ‘98, I decided to ask a few associates if they wanted to help me develop The Trip into a much larger and more commercial project. Expedition: North America (ENA) was then formed and began to gain momentum.  All of a sudden, The Trip was no longer mine, and I found that a lot of my original plans didn’t fit in the new way things had to be done.  I think on some level I also began to resent my relationship and the way it kept interfering with The Trip.

Early on, as I sat quietly in an ENA meeting with several associates, a trusted friend and associate broke the pace of a heated exchange between some members of the group when she stopped and looked directly at me. “Robert,” she said in her best attention getting voice, “you have to understand that this is not your painting anymore and others are going to come in and paint on your painting.” I suppose the grimace that was sliding across my face prompted her comment.  But, she had a point, and I went back to my silence.  Other meetings I wasn’t so silent, but “logic” and “good business sense” always prevailed.

Over the next year or so, the folks I had asked to contribute their considerable expertise did an incredible job. (I don’t think I will ever be able to express my gratitude to them for their contributions.) The project developed a life of its own, and as I watched in amazement, it was easy for me to ignore that tiny whisper in my heart that told me that the project was growing ahead of its time. After a while, the whisper faded away.

About six months before I was to leave for Key West, I finally was able to come to terms with my involvement in the relationship, and we went our separate ways. As might be expected in such a situation, I was instantly demoted to "the jerk" or worse, when I made that painful decision.  I don't think she feels that way, but a few of her friends did and I know a few of my associates did.

In the past few weeks, changes have taken place with this project.  My partners and I have gone our separate ways.  Although I am still not clear on all the ramifications of these changes, I am sure of one thing: The Trip has taken its life back.

Thank you for reading.

 -- Robert Lewis Knecht

December 10, 2000, Colorado Springs, CO.
 

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